Exams fewer!

I screamed into the phone and asked Naren where and when the exam was. I had slept off and was very sure I had missed the exam that was scheduled on that day. But, more pissing off was the fact that Naren was taking such a long time to tell me the schedule. I screamed at him again “DUDE! When is the fucking exam?” Naren replied “KC. I am looking for it man. WAIT!”. And as I roller skate, I hear this chic uttering “I am going to fail today!”. I want to slap the bitch for pretending not to have read, when I don’t even know which exam is there for the day, but I hold back. The roller-skate has this unique system – I keep my feet parallel, its in neutral gear; I keep one feet ahead of the other, it accelerates. I manage the turns fairly decently and reach my room. I open the door and I see bees all over the place. Must be the AC vent. But they surprisingly don’t bite me. I again shout into the phone, “Naren, why the fuck are you taking so much time to reach the schedule dude!”

It was 5am ET. I woke up laughing. I had an exam related dream after quite some time. But, I loved the detail in it. It had a typical me, shouting at others and Naren – who I would always shout at (well, we have a lot of mutual respect for each other I guess) being awake and not being bothered about anything. I also see this chic (I am not able to place who this is – It seemed like someone from my undergrad class actually). Now chics in my country mug their asses off and pretend (miserably that too) that they would surely flunk an exam. Believe me, they never do. All us guys know it, but we tolerate them, as they are absolutely essential to keep us few straight in an otherwise largely  gay (visibily) country (the gender skew).

I first flunked a ‘mid-term’ exam in 5th grade. It was the Kannada (my mother tongue – native language) paper – and a substitute teacher (the actual ‘friendly’ teacher was sick) gave me a 3 on a 100. ‘If not this bitch’, I always secured anywhere between 37 and 42 consistently. But ‘this’ one was being too harsh on me. I had to do some amazing stuff to ‘prolong’ (implies the amazing stuff failed) my dad’s caning for this. That’s for another day.

Then, was another time in PESIT. Discrete mathematics. Everyone told me “dude. Its super simple man”. So, I opened the book 12 hours before the semester exam and after intermittently dozing and reading for about 4 hrs of it, realized that others ought to have read the book already to declare it as easy. Next day was disastrous. Slept during the exam and had to write (yes, write!) a letter in the paper “Dear Sir/Madam, I actually scored a 100/100 in my 12th.. very bright student….but this time… gone wrong…please…give me 35…Thank you..<register number>”. The next two months were the scariest of my life (I still din’t know I would write exams at IIMB later in life).

Incidentally, I also remembered one of my Professors today. His was the happiest exam I have written until now. A multiple choice, +1/-1 scoring pattern paper in Investments. The man was hilarious and made learning fun.

Naren finally said – “dude! we missed it. We don’t want to be consultants know? (in a typical Tamil Iyengar swagger) why do we need the grades then? Lets put egg maggi at the mess. Come dude”

And as in reality, life moved on.

Tagged: dreams, exams, IIMB, PESIT

Posted in: dreams